What’s the result?

What’s the outcome you want?

Do you want to be free of anxiety, fear, stress?

Do you want to feel freedom, joy, peace?

Does it feel like if you don’t feel anxiety or fear you’ll have nothing at all?  That you’ll never do anything, feel anything again?

That’ll you’ll just become a blob?

I know it seems like such a ridiculous question doesn’t it?

I mean who wants to feel stressed and anxious?

Who’d want to feel their life is ruled by an uncontrollable feeling?

As crazy as it sounds, and maybe I’m the only one who’s felt this way, but as uncomfortable as the anxiety and fear was, they were familiar, they were safe. (And don’t get me wrong I still have days where it feels that way).

I knew these feelings, I’d lived with them all my life and knew how they felt.

I didn’t know how happiness and joy felt. Worse I couldn’t feel the edges of them. Without stress and anxiety, there weren’t any boundaries, so I had no idea what the limits were.

It was a scary feeling, you know?

I needed a container to put happiness in if I was going to experience it. And yet that was in direct opposition to the feeling of freedom I really wanted to experience.

I really wanted to be free from anxiety’s shackles and at the same time she’d become a familiar friend that gave my life definition.

So what do you do when you’re at the cross roads between joy and angst? What do you do when you’re scared to release one rope to grab the other?

And worse what do you do when you feel you don’t have any support if you fall? What if you don’t have  family or friends that support you no matter what; so that it seems as if falling would be fatal, that there’d not be anyone of the other side to cheer you on?

It’s a lonely feeling isn’t it?

I hear so many people out there doing big things, and in every case they feel supported by their Mom, Dad, God or someone.

But what about those of us who don’t have that? Who didn’t feel supported when we were growing up?

In every case you DECIDE, you CHOOSE to feel better no matter what people around you think or do or don’t do.

You have a choice in how you feel, AND THERE ISN’T A WRONG CHOICE.

If you want to feel anxious, that’s your choice. And if it feels like you don’t have a choice to feel anxious or not, that your body or brain has control over that, I get it. I’ve been there, and that’s okay too.

So the real heart of the matter is that you can be okay with how you feel, or you can choose to feel different.

Allow yourself to be who you are.

(When you contemplate that, when you think it’s okay to feel what you feel, doesn’t that just make you want to take a deep breath?)

What’s the direction you want to go?

Do you want to stay where you are? Where the terrain may be rough but familiar.

Or do you want to move on down the trail and see what lies ahead?

Either way, choose. Choose to stay or choose to go, just make sure you know you’re choosing.

Is it can’t or won’t?

You Decide.

 

Now I’d like to hear from you. What’s the outcome you want but don’t feel you can achieve? How do you want to feel? How do you want to experience life?

What choice are you gonna make today?

#thoughtlift

 

Much love,
Holly

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